Marriage is not 50/50. It’s 100/100.
Whether you’ve been married for two minutes, two years, two decades or what feels like two lifetimes, this is something every couple should read. Marriage is not easy and there is no shame in admitting you need marriage advice from time to time.
So if you’re reading this article on marriage advice, it doesn’t mean you’re having a hard time with marriage. It just means that you need a little help from wise old owls who have been through the same thing!
Here’s the thing about marriage advice: It’s great to know that you’re not alone in it. It’s good to know that people have worked out even the toughest of situations and stayed married till death do them part!
There are a lot of ways to help you and your spouse have a thriving marriage!
25 Marriage Advice Tips Every Couple Needs to Read Now:
1. Always choose love, even when it’s hard to like each other
Ugh, he left his socks on the floor AGAIN (for the millionth time) and he just threw his laundry on your freshly made sheets. And are you serious, she left the air-conditioning on in every single room?! Does she think I strike the lottery every day?
Sound like familiar thoughts you might have of your other half sometimes? It’s really REALLY hard to say you like them during these moments of frustration. But try to remember this: Choose the relationship. Choose love. Choose the day you realised you first fell in love with your spouse. Don’t dwell on the little things.
Choose the marriage.
2. Answer that text from them!
Sure, you have been together for so long that you definitely know what each other is thinking. And yeah, when he texts that he’s on the way home or when she texts you to pick up some milk on the way home, don’t just read it and ignore the message. A simple reply like, “Can’t wait to see you, honey,” or “Sure, I would love to help you, darling,” goes a long way.
3. Date night is a MUST
We cannot stress how important this is. You can get engrossed with work and the kids and the house chores all week long. But one thing you should never put aside is date night. Even if it’s just two hours out alone with your spouse, this is something many successful couples admit to doing.
4. Don’t let the phone distract you
We’re on our phones all the time. Whether we’re scrolling through Instagram for the tenth time today or reading up on news, make it a point to put your phone away when your other half enters the room/car/bed and just focus at least one full minute of attention on them and let them know that they are more important than whatever is on your phone screen.
5. Laugh, cry, whatever it is, express yourself
Do you remember your wedding day? You didn’t care who saw you laugh or cry. What was most important was expressing yourself to your other half – no matter how raw the emotion was. Keep that alive in the marriage. Make it a point to laugh (or cry) in front of your spouse to let them know how you’re feeling in that exact moment.
6. Arguments are not about winning
Sometimes we get so heated up in argument, everything from 10 years ago start popping up. We forget the reason why we’re even arguing in the first place. That feeling that takes over is the need to win. But what exactly are you winning when you win an argument with the person you claim to love most in the world? Arguments should not end up with a “winner” or a “loser”.
7. Don’t let sex take a backseat
Sex is incredibly important in a relationship. Always make it a priority!
8. Support each other in times of weakness
In good and bad, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer. You don’t enter a marriage only for the good times. You’re in it for the bad times too. Don’t forget to support each other during each other’s weakest moments.
9. Marriage is not 50/50
This is one of my favourite marriage advice tips. Marriage is not 50/50. You don’t go into a marriage only to contribute half your effort. Marriage is going in full on, 100%, without hesitation or reservations. You know what’s 50/50? A divorce. Marriage is doing everything with your whole heart, ensuring both of you will do WHATEVER it takes to make it work.
10. Give your best to each other
Sometimes, it’s easy to take each other for granted. You give your best self to work, to your parents, to your friends, to whatever else in your life. But the person you should be giving your best self to at all times is your other half. Don’t take each other for granted.
11. Don’t ever compare your marriage
Do you know what is the most common reason for unhappiness in marriages? It isn’t infidelity, I’ll tell you that. It’s unmet expectations. If you set your marriage up for ridiculous expectations based on other people’s relationships, you’re only setting it up for failure. Don’t ever compare your marriage to others.
12. Marriage is ongoing
Marriage is ongoing. Life is ongoing. There is no pause button on it. Not even for kids.
13. Never keep secrets from each other
A good marriage only works with full transparency.
14. Don’t lie to each other
What’s the point? Seriously. Trust takes years to earn, but only a second to break. Is trust worth breaking over a white lie?
15. Say sorry
If you ever make a mistake and get into an argument with your spouse, find it within you to humble yourself and say sorry. By putting your ego aside to say sorry, you’re not only apologising, you’re also saying, “I choose this marriage. I choose to make things work.”
16. Forgive easily
If your husband or wife has apologised for something, forgive them immediately. This is your way of saying, “I choose this marriage over my ego and I want us to move on from this.”
17. Have patience with each other
No matter how well we think we know our other halves, sometimes we really may not understand what they are saying. But instead of snapping at them and brushing them aside, have some patience to understand them better. As humans, we’re always growing and evolving. So we should always make the effort to understand our spouses the way they are as time passes.
18. Encourage, don’t put them down
You should be your spouse’s biggest supporter. And please, don’t berate them in public. It reflects more on the kind of person YOU are rather than them.
19. Never talk badly about your spouse to others or online
Leave the petty tweets to the teenagers please!
20. Always wear your wedding ring
The ring is a symbol of your marriage. Don’t forget to wear it proudly!
21. Never threaten your spouse
Don’t threaten them with divorce or give them an ultimatum. That’s just not cool.
22. Respect each other
This may sound easy in theory. But if you have polarising views on something, can you set aside your ego long enough to respect your husband or wife’s opinion?
23. Show appreciation
It’s as easy as saying “thank you” when they open the door for you or buy food back home. A small thank you goes a long way.
24. Never make your spouse feel small
Don’t treat your husband or wife like a child. Don’t let them think that whatever they are doing for the family isn’t good enough.
25. Treat your husband or wife the way you want your son or daughter’s future spouse to treat them
This is really important. Your children are looking toward you and your spouse to set a good example. If you show them a good example, chances are they are also going to attract the right kind of person to spend the rest of their lives with.
This article has been republished with permission from theAsianparent.
Do you have any marriage advice that you would like to add on to this? Let us know in the comments!